Public Service Announcement

If you plan to take your child to the doctor's office, beware of what you feed him or her for breakfast. They may see this and decide that a call to DCFS is in order:

Thanks to my son's affection of climbing stairs and being naked, I noticed this frightening (and rather large) mark on his thigh before anybody else did. After much panic I thankfully noticed a tiny purple spot on his diaper as well. How I missed the stray (squashed) blueberry in his high chair when I cleaned up his breakfast is beyond me. Thankfully it was nothing a little soap couldn't take care of! Crisis averted.

Easter Weekend

For the first time since its release, Josh and I sat down and watched the Passion of the Christ together on Thursday night.  It had been eight years since I experienced the movie (because it's something you experience, not just watch!) and I was struck by just how different it all felt to me.  Eight years ago I sat in a theater fully knowing the story and what Jesus' sacrifice meant, but I was not living a life that really reflected that.  I sat in a pew on (some) Sunday mornings, but my choices and values that I lived out Monday thru Saturday were not based on any strong pillars of faith.  My life at that time centered around me: what I wanted, what I needed, what I thought was best for me.  The faith I lived out was more from the book of Kim than any other book of the Bible and occassionally influenced by those around me.  Even though I knew, as I have always known, that God loved me and sent His only son to die for me, it was only that: knowledge.  But it wasn't my life.  I sat in the theater with my sister and brother-in-law and bawled my eyes out, mainly because I could not get over the brutality of it all.  Christ's death is still one of the most horrific acts of humankind (and I don't think that was an accident) and even though I left the theater understanding the true sacrifice a little bit more, it did nothing to change the way I was living.

As I sat and watched this with my husband the other night it was so different than that last time.  Sure, I was still outraged by the hateful way Jesus was treated, but in the back of my mind I just kept reassuring myself that it had to happen this way.  It was all planned out to long before Jesus was born.  This time I also noticed tiny details that I would've overlooked before- how the disciples all fell asleep while waiting in the garden, why Jesus starts his sentences with 'Amen', how water would pour out of Him when He was pierced on the cross, etc.- because now I not only know the story, but I've read it numerous times and have a more intimate understanding of it.  Before seeing some of these details on screen, I would wonder if certain ones would be depicted, and they always were, just as I had read them- small details that I never would have picked up on the first time around.  Small details I would not have picked up on had I never read the accounts of His death for myself.

More than anything, however, I could not bear the thought of what Mary went through that day.  Now that I have seen this film through a mother's eyes it completely tore me up.  Mary knew this day was coming, but even she could not have imagined what she would have to witness that day.  As she watched her son be beaten, mopped up his blood, and kissed his feet after his death I wondered to myself, 'could I have endured the same pain?  Could I watch my own son go through that sort of brutal punishment for a crime he did not commit?  Would I stay there until the bitter end?'  But when I got home and cuddled my own precious angel I knew the answer without a doubt.  Absolutely I would.  She was a mother like any other who could not bear the thought of leaving her son to go through pain alone, even though the pain he felt was much different than how she suffered.  This time I cried mostly for Mary, for her pain, and for the sacrifice she made for us, too.  I thought of my Aunt Claudia, how she must've felt after my cousin Tommy died in a motorcycle accident, and how holding onto his lifeless body was the only thing she could do to ease his pain, even though it was more to try and somehow ease hers.  Mothers should never have to lose their sons (or children in general).  I've always believed this, but now that I have my own really hits home.  God chose to lose His son for us.  Actually, God chose to crush His son for us.  To have him brutally beaten until he was unrecognizable.  To have him publicly mocked and shamed.  To have Him hung on a cross to die in the most painful form of capital punishment that this world has ever seen.  And He did that for me.  Yep, me, who lived by my own wild ways for years and years; it doesn't matter anymore because He always waited and wanted me back.  And He did that for YOU.  The God of the universe, who created the earth and everything on it, cares so deeply about you and me that He sacrificed what was most precious to Him.  And this Easter, I am so very grateful and feeling so very blessed.  It truly is the greatest love-story ever written.

This weekend as you spend time with your families, go to church, hunt eggs, and enjoy the (hopefully) beautiful spring weather, take some time to remember what this day is truly all about.  As followers of Christ we tend to make a bigger deal out of Christmas, but this day is truly what sets us free.  Jesus was beaten and killed, rose from the dead, and left behind an empty tomb- his happy ending is indeed ours, too.  If you don't know the story I would encourage you to read it and you can find it in all four Gospels in the Bible.  And if you have not seen the movie I would encourage you to watch it, and make sure you have a box of Kleenex nearby.  And if you can, look past the inhumanity of those who hated Him and instead focus on the fact that He did this because of those who He loves.  He loves you.  He loves me.  And that is something worth celebrating.

From our house to yours, have a very happy Easter holiday!

For my Father’s will is that everyone who looks to the Son and believes in him shall have eternal life, and I will raise them up at the last day.”

John 6:40

My "To Done" List

Wow, airing out what a slacker I have been lately really seemed to get me going!  Seriously, it has done wonders for my motivation these last couple of days!  Now I think I understand why some people blog incessantly about working out or crafting... perhaps it helps keep them accountable, thus making them more productive.  The strange thing is that while I was doing things that were on my list from my post about this, I also started getting things done that I didn't even realize I had to do!  Granted, I still have a long way to go and I know that the list will grow before it gets shorter, but here is what I have accomplished:

• Curtains for the office / playroom: ORDERED!  And the best part?  I found a random JC Penney gift card in my desk (see what you might find when you clean?), which not only paid for the curtains, but half of my sister's birthday gift, too.  As a sidenote, if you're ever looking for window treatments, JC Penney has an awesome selection.  Just FYI.
• Which brings me to my sister's birthday gifts... both IN THE MAIL!  Go me!  Both sisters should be receiving their belated birthday gifts early next week.  And my Nana's card?  On the way, too!
• I have taken pictures (almost) everyday this week in order to start back up with Project365
• Although I have no plans to start back up on P90X anytime soon- especially with le bebe on the way- I did go for a walk on Thursday and a walk/run (more walking than running mind you) today.  I plan to get up early 2 mornings this week and go to the gym... now that it's on the blog I have to do it, right?  Right???
• And here's all of the random stuff that wasn't on the blog that got done: the bag of clothes that has been sitting on our bedroom floor for ages is now at Goodwill, the old Comcast boxes (we briefly switched and have since decided to stick with DirecTV) were disconnected and returned to the Comcast payment center, I wrote all of the thank-you notes for Jake's birthday and will hand them out at church this weekend, and I took all of Josh's old photos out of the box they were in, organized them, and put them into an album... a surprise that he loved!

He was out of town last week which I sometimes think is helpful for getting things accomplished.  I don't feel like I am missing out on spending time with him to get some of this stuff done instead.  And his dad is coming into town this week so I'm hoping some of those home-improvement related items will get knocked off the list while I have some extra help with Jake.

So here's what I think... post all of those half-done projects on your blog and see if it helps you get the motivation to turn your "To Do" list into a "To Done" list!  Next up on mine?  Organize Jake's photos and get his baby and year one books finished.  This one may take awhile, but I'll never finish if I don't get started, right?

The Salamander Pajamas

One year ago this month my family lost my beloved Aunt Barbara.  To say she is missed is such an understatement... the world lost a little bit of sunshine the day she passed away. I'm not the only one who thinks she was pretty darn special either- Emerson High School is dedicating a softball field to her.  She was a high school teacher and softball coach for years and years and many people worked together in the effort to honor her this way.  Like I said, she is missed by many people.  The dedication is at the end of this month and although I am sad that I don't get to be there, I was filled with pride when I was sent this picture of the brand new sign:

I mean really, how awesome is that?

Like I said, I am going to miss the dedication, but I know I will be thinking of her that day.  Actually, I think of her often and nothing in particular really triggers it.  They are just random memories of Aunt B that come my way from time to time and I love that.  The one thing I always hope to remember though is her voice.  That voice is engrained in my memory and I hope it's there to stay.  Anytime I talked to her on the phone she'd say, "Hi, Kimber!" and that's the phrase that I can still hear.  And I really miss hearing it.

The other day I was switching out Jake's clothes yet again.  It seems like all I've done during year one is bring one bin up to the attic and bring another one down.  It's kind of fun in a way because I get to see all of the new outfits my little man will be wearing in the upcoming months, but it's always a bit sad to put the ones he has outgrown away.  It's just a reminder of how quickly the little one is growing up.  But on this particular occasion, I got such a special treat.  As I pulled out items of clothing one by one a particular pair of pants caught my eye.  I just sat there, frozen in place as I stared at them in the bin.  Tiny pajama pants, covered in colorful salamanders, would probably be nothing special to anyone else.  But to me, they were a gift all over again.  Jake never met his Great Aunt B, but before she passed away she sent him a pair of pajamas.... cute, colorful salamander pajamas.  I remember opening them and thinking to myself how very "Aunt B" they were and how I couldn't wait for him to wear them someday.  With tags still on them I packed them in the 12-18 month bin and forgot all about them.  And then twelve months later I stumbled upon them- simple salamander pajamas that have taken on a whole new meaning... the most special gift a little boy could receive, but an even more special gift for his mama.

Aunt B, it's as if you planned it.  Thank you for popping in and saying "hello" to me and my little boy the other day... it's another one of those memories that will forever be branded in my mind.  Just a mom unpacking her child's clothes to find herself sobbing in the upstairs hallway, all because of a pair of pajamas.  But now, when my little man wears them, they are filled with energy and life, just as you would have it.  And I know that no matter what, you're a part of him and he's a part of you, and your legacy will be carried on forever.  A part of me is always sad when I put away the clothes that Jake has outgrown, but when these get too small, I'm really not sure I'll be able to pack them away with the rest.  Perhaps he'll just have to wear them until the seams fall out.

You are truly missed.

Unfinished Business

Lately I have come to realize that I have gotten really bad at finishing things that I start.  Take this blog for example... I used to post on here regularly and now it seems like it's once in a blue moon.  Granted, I don't feel like I have much blog-worthy stuff to say, but surely I can find something!  Or my Project365 which lasted all of, what?  Three weeks?  Awesome.  Or the P90X workout that I started last summer... let's see, that ended up being about P3X since it lasted a whopping 3 days.  Now I do know that having a kid puts a whole new dimension of time demands on a person, and that comes on top of working a full-time job from home, keeping house, and trying to serve the church a bit as well as my husband, but how much of this slackerness is acceptable?  Let's take a look around the house, shall we?

Ah yes, my office-slash-playroom.  See the curtains on the right side of the room?  Yeah, well I ordered one too-few panels and was supposed to either find someone to chop the existing panel in two and hem the edge or (more likely) get online and order a second panel.  Yeah, neither have been done.  Not to mention that I had grand plans to organize this mess and that hasn't happened yet either.

Which leads me to another room in the house- the spare bedroom and possibly Jake's room when the new baby comes along.  It's hard to see in this tiny picture, but when we painted the room blue, there was a shelf up that I couldn't get down.  So when my father-in-law last visited in December, I had him take it down, fully intending to spackle and paint those spots.  Yup, it's now four months later.  I think it may be about time to "get around to it."

Moving on... our beautiful remodeled bathroom.  By the time we had completed this we were both over it.  Especially Josh.  So I told myself that I would do the touch-up work later.  Yeah well, that was last fall... long before that shelf in the above picture came down.  And there is still orange on the white and the ceiling still needs a top coat of paint.  Just don't look up when you're in this room, okay?

This one actually makes me laugh a little bit because it is a room that is finished, just not in this picture.  I took this picture ages ago as a "before" picture for the blog, have since repainted and redecorated and still have yet to take and post the "after" picture.  Seriously- how hard is that?

 And it's not just house stuff if you're wondering that by now.  It's little things, too.  For example, this is a photo of my Nana's birthday card, still yet to be mailed.  My Nana's birthday was in January!  Not to mention that she's been in the hospital over this past month and I'm sure a little mail would cheer her up.  Ridiculous.

And while I'm on the topic of birthdays, not only did I totally forget to do birthday blog posts for both sisters in March, but both are still waiting on their gifts.  Well, they're not really waiting because we don't expect anything from each other, but I still have yet to get anything in the mail to them (along with some money I owe one of them).  This bag has been sitting on my dining room table mocking me... I just need to get it in a box and mail it already!  And I know exactly what I want to get the other sister and just haven't gone out to pick it up yet.  Another thing on my ever-growing "To Do" list.

As a mom, time really does get away from you more often then not, but when surveying my surroundings lately I've realized that I use this "lack of time" as an excuse!  Even when it comes to the important things such as my daily Bible study, which is now weekly if I'm lucky.  It took me months to finish Numbers, and granted, it's not the most exciting book in the Bible, but it should not have taken nearly that long!  So I've decided I need to hit the "Reset" button and start finishing these things that I've started... no more excuses.  In fact, I'm going to rid my life of excuses all together.  Some things are unavoidable of course- I mean, I can't go to Hawaii if someone asks me because I don't really have the funding for that, but things like that aren't excuses but rather reality.  But when I can, I plan to start being more proactive and persevere until I finish my projects.  We'll see how it goes... I'll keep you posted.  In fact, I think I'm going to start right. this. minute.  So here's my commitment for tonight... this project has been calling my name for some time now:

Gotta go!  Can't put it off any longer!

What projects can you get finished this week?

Play ball!

It's hard to believe that Jake's first birthday party came and went, but I do believe we will deem it a success!  We had such a great time having friends over and celebrating our little boy and he made out like a bandit!  As my husband put it, it was the best first birthday party he's ever been to!  I'm with him on that one... even if it's the only first birthday party we've ever been to!  Although I will admit, it was so nice to put my party-planning skills back into action again... it's been too long!  I used to plan events for a living, and now that my career has me working on the sales side instead of the planning side, I don't get to participate in the fun, creative process anymore.  I think I'll have to find more reasons to have parties from here on out!  But enough about me, here's how we celebrated Jake!

This is the invitation that my uber-talented sister, Mindy, created for us!  It was even perforated like a real event ticket would be!  I am happy to see her putting her artistic talent to work and she is starting a business doing just this kind of thing... custom invitations and theme party work!  We could not have been happier with how they turned out (and I'm not just saying that because she's my sister!):

She also created other logos for us to use, too.  You can't really tell in the picture below, but she made a J in a baseball diamond seen in the upper left-hand corner of this sign.  I made signs like this all over the house- "Player Parking" in the driveway, "Locker Room" for the bathroom, "Dugout" for the screened-in porch, "Field Access" for the door to the backyard, "Club Seating" for the living room, and "Concession Stand" for the kitchen.  Sadly, I only snapped a picture of this one... how did that happen?

And then of course I used my "I-pretend-to-be-crafty-but-I'm-really-not" skills to make some custom decor for my little guy:

Now for the important part... the food!  I'm incredibly disappointed in myself for not taking a picture of the spread in the kitchen.  We had a concession stand complete with a hot-dog and nacho machine!  Yum!  Our hot dog bar was complete with onions, relish, sourkraut, and ketchup and mustard and there were jalapenos for the nachos of course!  Jake's smash cake and the cupcakes (chocolate, yellow, and chocolate chip) for everyone else were displayed on the dining room table:

And here is the contribution from my other sister, Angie!  THANK YOU for icing all of the baseballs!  I think we had about 48 cupcakes total and she probably iced 40 of them... it would've been a long night without her help and I loved how they turned out!  I did the J's mainly because we had so much leftover green and blue icing, but they ended up matching the little logos my sister had made.

And then for Jake's cake... I must say, I am quite proud of it!  A few weeks before I had taken a cake decorating class from a super-talented friend who runs her own cake business, so I got a bit ambitious after that.  It certainly wasn't perfect, but for my first try I was quite pleased... especially if you saw it before I had to fix it... but that's another story entirely!  As a sidenote I have to add that when I was growing up, my mom made just about every birthday cake and always did a fantastic job.  It was so important to me to carry that on and do the same for my kids.  Josh thought I was a bit crazy at first, but really liked the outcome.  And it's like I told him... this one was the first birthday cake so just imagine how amazing his 18th birthday cake is going to look!

And we had ZERO complaints from the little man... he loved every. last. bite.

As for presents, I'm telling you, it was like Christmas here!  My husband could not resist getting this for the Jakester... his first power wheels!  He still likes to push it more than he likes to ride on it, but I think Josh is living vicariously through Jake so everyone wins!  Besides, doesn't he look like the cutest little redneck baby ever???

When I started this blog, I imagined that I would do these DIY posts with beautiful photos of every detail of every event.  After this party, I realized that I'm just not that mom!  I would love to have more photos of the signs I made and the concession stand set-up complete with close-ups of hot dogs roasting, but I found myself setting the camera down more than I picked it up.  Because at the end of the day I really just enjoyed that day... every minute of it.  This is the only first birthday party he's ever going to have (sniff, sniff!) so I'm okay with not quite being the blogger that I always imagined I'd be.  It's nice to look back and just know that I was busy being the mom that I've always wanted to be.  I think Jake's okay with that, too.

Hope you enjoyed our party as much as we did.  Now the questions is how we're ever going to top it next year!  I think I have plenty of time to figure that one out!

O-N-E

My dearest Jakie-boy,

It seems like just yesterday we were anxiously awaiting your arrival and feeling like your birthday would never get here.  And now, before my very eyes, you have grown into my sweet little one-year-old and I already wonder where the time went.  Some days seemed incredibly long, especially there at the beginning, but now looking back it all went by too fast.  I hardly even remember you as a squishy little newborn anymore, which is good since it means that we are living in the moment.  Since I know every year from here on out will go by just as fast, if not faster, here are some things that I want to remember about you at one:

• Although you walk everywhere you go, you do still lose your balance on occassion and get very clumsy when you're tired.  Watching you catch your balance always makes us laugh.
• You look at lights and fans and say "dah."  I'm not sure what it means... Aunt Mindy thinks you're saying "that."  Although when we say "where's the fan" you can look up to find it, so who knows.
• Your other words include mama, dada, ball (ba), book (buh), and dog (da).  Your favorite word is probably "dada" though and you chatter a lot.  You recently learned how to answer, "What does a cow say?" with "Oooooooh!"  So cute!
• If we turn on music you always inevitably bop up and down to it, dancing to the beat.  I have a few videos, but have not yet figured out how to upload them yet.  Any time you hear music you stop what you're doing and try to figure out where it's coming from.
• You walk around church like you own the place, and always beeline for the stage.  If I have you in the sanctuary, you're very good through worship and then try to talk over Daddy as soon as he gets up there.
• You LOVE water.  The tub, the dog bowl, the toilet (ugh!), and even just spilled water on the floor.  Once we dripped some on the kitchen floor when doing dishes and you tried to lay and roll in it!
• You have figured out how to turn up the volume on the system downstairs.  You like it LOUD and we are constantly fighting you with the remote to keep it at an acceptable volume.  I already see a long future of me telling you to "TURN THAT MUSIC DOWN!!!"
• You are such a good sharer!  You are always trying to share your food with us and you sweetly gave your cousin Adam any toy you were playing with when we visited last week.
• You also love babies (thank goodness since we have one coming!).  You practically try to climb in the carseat with them!
• You have quite the temper, but only when we try to take something away from you or close a door when you want to go in that room (mainly the bathroom).  You basically scream at the top of your lungs for a few seconds and then you're over it.
• You eat just about anything with vigor.  Grapes are probably your favorite though!
• You sleep great, too!  You go right down for your naps with no fuss and wake up with a smile on your face.
• Stairs are just too much fun!  You get up them rather quickly and recently learned how to slide down them on your belly.
• You are ALL BOY.  You love to be outside in any weather or temperature and it immediately makes you happy, no matter what mood you were in.  You love to play in dirt, sand, or whatever else can get you dirty.
• You have a healthy obsession with books, which I love!  I didn't think you'd ever sit still long enough, but now we can read one or two before bed and you almost always choose a book over a toy when you're playing by yourself (which you're very good at).
• You've recently started hiding things (like your cousin and friend Cai do!).  I found a toy phone in the hamper today, a tube of drop-ins in the refrigerator, a mega-block in the dishwasher, and a can of hairspray in the toilet.  That one was my favorite.

Oh my I could go on and on and on and on.  It's amazing how much love your daddy and I have for you... it's completely immeasurable.  And every day we love you more.  At every month I look at you and say, "this age is my favorite" and I hope that continues.  I miss my squishy newborn but I love the little boy that you are.  You are so very special and I can already see so much of your daddy's drive and ambition... you will do great things, my son, and I am already so incredibly proud of you.  No matter where life takes you, just know that you are loved tremendously.  Never stop being my sweet-natured, happy, curious, lively little boy.

Happy birthday, baby boy.

Love, Mommy